| Satire Fiction posted June 26, 2025 | Chapters: |
...23 24 -25- 26 
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The final showdown
A chapter in the book Milton vs the HOA
Milton vs the HOA - Chapter 25
by Jim Wile
| Background A meek accountant moves into the HOA from hell. |
Recap of Chapter 24: Dorothy muses on her downfall and can’t accept that it was the inconsequential Milton Frobish who brought her down. A pre-trial hearing is held to determine if the bank records that reveal Dorothy’s malfeasance could be suppressed for seemingly (to Dorothy) having been obtained illegally.
The hearing is held, and both Esme and Rosie testify that the bank records were in full view of everyone at Betty’s house, and they watched the pages flipping over until Rosie closed the window. Milton also confirms this, but Dorothy’s defense attorney on cross questions how Milton could have memorized 32 pages in such a short time. Milton carefully words his reply so that he isn’t lying and says he “availed himself of a photographic memory,” meaning George’s, of course, whom no one but him can see or hear.
The defense lawyer decides to put it to a test, and, with George’s help, Milton is able to perfectly recite a passage selected at random by the judge, who then dismisses the motion to suppress.
Chapter 25
Throughout Milton’s recitation, Dorothy Clodfelter’s spirit sank like the Titanic as it took on water. All the lifeboats had left, though, and she remained onboard. Her best hope to survive unscathed had been to suppress the evidence, but that was now gone. It was likely only a matter of time until she slid into the freezing waters of her future.
A confused Penny Smalls, who was sitting next to her turned and said, “What just happened? Does that mean the bank records can be used at the trial?”
Dorothy gave her a withering look. She was about to come back with a sarcastic reply but reconsidered. She didn’t want to antagonize Penny at this point for fear she would confess everything and destroy any chance they might have to escape the ruin.
Instead, she said, “Let’s not lose hope. We can still try to pin it all on Betty. She isn’t around anymore to refute it. We’ve still got a good chance of prevailing.”
“I hope you’re right. I don’t know how I would survive in jail. They have to wear those awful orange jumpsuits. Orange is not my color at all.”
“Maybe you could request a blue one if it comes to that. You do look better in blue.” Dorothy couldn’t resist this jibe, which she didn’t think Penny would grasp. She also didn’t honestly think she could convince anyone that Betty was the fraudster.
She held out a vague hope that the tie to the road repair company would go undetected. God knows she had set up enough intermediary companies to distance her from this shell corporation.
That goddamn Milton Frobish! But for him, none of this would have come to light, and her life wouldn’t be falling apart right now. What, if anything, could still be done about it?
One evening in early December, a 6-inch snowstorm blanketed the area. It had been an early foray into the winter season, with a sudden freezing blast followed by temperatures back in the usual 40s by the following day.
Since the HOA would no longer be employing the services of Preston Solutions for road work, Milton hired a snow plowing company to come plow the road in the morning. The company said they would return the next day if the snow hadn’t melted, as they hadn’t completed the sidewalks.
The road had been plowed well, and by late afternoon, it was quite clear and dry. Milton was going to have dinner down at Rosie’s house and decided to walk in the street since the sidewalk was slushy. He walked down the left side of the street to watch for oncoming cars as a pedestrian is supposed to.
Right at that time, Dorothy Clodfelter was returning from a meeting with her attorney, and she was in a foul mood. Her attorney had received the results of the sheriff’s department’s investigation through discovery, and the amount of evidence against her was overwhelming. They had been able to track through the myriad corporations Dorothy had set up to hide her embezzlement, and the picture was clear now of how she had been looting the HOA.
It was in this evil mood that she spotted Milton Frobish walking down the street as she was driving toward him.
A fiendish gleam came into her eyes, and the worry that had plagued her countenance was suddenly replaced by a look of reckless abandon. With an uncontrollable urge, she stomped the accelerator to the floor, and her wheels spun until they grabbed the road and sent her car hurtling toward her unsuspecting nemesis with the intention of mowing him down.
Milton was musing about having dinner with his beloved and then working out one of the songs they would be suggesting to Chordially Yours when all of a sudden, he heard an engine rev and noticed a car with squealing tires suddenly bearing down on him. He stood there like a deer in the headlights, transfixed by this two-ton vehicle aiming right at him.
Geordie?
Stay where you are, Milton. It’s that infernal Dorothy Clodfelter trying to run you down. Don’t worry; I’ve got this.
Are you sure?
Don’t move!
As the car was rapidly approaching and got to within 30 feet of Milton, suddenly a patch of ice, which had not been there moments before, spread across the road in front of the car. When it hit the ice, the rear wheels spun out, and the whole car, which had accelerated to 60 mph, went into a massive skid, completely out of control. It narrowly missed Milton as it continued its skid toward the side of the road, where it jumped the curb and began flipping over and over down a hill on that side.
Milton heard it end in a crash, presumably against a tree at the bottom. He mounted the curb, rushed across the sidewalk, and looked down the hill. He saw that the car was upside down against a tree and had burst into flames upon impact. He ran down the hill and started to approach the car, but the flames were now raging out of control. He heard a scream from inside. He made one more effort to approach the car, but he quickly retreated as the heat and flames pouring out prevented any attempt at a rescue.
The agonized screaming inside lasted for another 20 seconds until suddenly there was silence, broken only by the crackling sounds of the fire that continued to burn for a long time after.
Milton stood there in a daze. This was the third death in the neighborhood he had been a party to in the few short months since he had moved here. Geordie, Betty, and now Dorothy would probably still be alive today if he had never moved in. It was a sobering thought, yet he didn’t feel responsible for any of their deaths. Maybe a little bit in Geordie’s, but Dorothy Clodfelter had been at the root of all of them.
Thanks for saving me, Geordie. Did you actually intend for her to die, though?
No, Milton. I was only attempting to make sure she didn’t hit you. You must not feel responsible in any way for this. I certainly don’t.
I don’t either. She tried to kill me. The punishment was perhaps harsh, but she brought it on herself.
What do you suppose will happen now with her trial? I was hoping the HOA would be able to get some restitution from her, but that seems doubtful now.
Maybe not. Consult with your attorney about this. There may still be a way. And there’s always the trial against Penny Smalls and the attempts to get dues in arrears from those other four. Just because they were told they didn’t have to pay them doesn’t make it so.
Geordie, thanks again for saving my life from that maniac. I’ll never forget it.
You’re welcome, Brother.
I’d best call 911 now to report this.
Yes, and I’ll make sure that patch of ice is still there when they come, as well as a few others to allay any suspicion.
I don’t know if I’ll ever be able to get that screaming out of my head.
Seems like an appropriate end for someone who most likely will spend eternity in similar fashion. She just got a little preview of it first.
The final chapter will be posted on Monday.
 Recognized |
Milton Frobish: A meek 41-year-old accountant, who moves into an HOA with his brother, George.
George Frobish (Geordie): The 44-year-old invalid brother of Milton. After his death, George becomes a ghost that only Milton can see.
Esme Green (pronounced Ez-may): Milton's next-door neighbor. She is 75.
Dorothy Clodfelter: The president of the Riverwood HOA.
Penny Smalls: The vice president of the Riverwood HOA.
Betty Kleinsmith: The senile treasurer of the Riverwood HOA.
Rosemary Kleinsmith (Rosie): Betty's adult granddaughter. She is 35.
Irene Ferguson: Esme's next-door neighbor.
Robby Martel: Rosie's ex-husband.
Picture courtesy of Imagen-3
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