| Humor Poetry
posted June 11, 2025 |
An old joke in amphibrach meter
Who's the Boss?
Now, who is the boss here? the organs all wondered.
We’ve certainly got to put someone in charge.
Our body’s important, let’s try not to blunder
for health is the goal, and we’ll keep it writ large.
“It’s got to be me,” said the brain with great ardor.
“For I run the systems that keep us alive.
There isn’t another who works any harder.
Without me I challenge you all to survive.”
“Pick me,” said the blood, “for I circulate widely
the food and the oxygen all the day through.
Note well, my good brain, since you said it so snidely,
I work just as hard; I’m as vital as you.”
“But I’m the best candidate,” piped up the stomach.
“I break down the food so you all can be nourished.
Without me the body’d be thin as a toothpick.
It’s me you must vote for!” he said with a flourish.
“No way,” said the skeleton. “You must be crazy.
Without me, the body’d be nothing but goo.
It’s my inner strength that precludes being lazy
like jellyfish floating with nothing to do.”
“Well, could it be me?” asked the timorous rectum.
“I let out the waste. That’s a critical task.”
The others just laughed. “We could never elect him.
That’s simply ridiculous, since he has asked.”
So, the rectum decided to punish these slighters
and clamped up so tightly that movement was stalled.
The result was incredibly bad for those blighters.
You might say that they were intensely appalled.
The brain got a headache, the stomach got bloated,
the blood was anemic, the bones were like clay.
This surely affected how all the parts voted.
The rectum was hands-down the winner that day.
For the moral, I think we can draw the conclusion:
Although all the others do most of the work,
the asshole is usually in charge of the action
in spite of the fact that he’s often a jerk.
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Jim Wile
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Jim Wile
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